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Friday, January 23, 2009

The Wonderful World of Retail

I came THIS close to committing a felony this afternoon.

After spending close to an hour with a young woman and her two children trying to pick out a sofa and love seat, I had her all set on about a $1,400 deal when her obnoxious mother decided to try and see if I was a UFC fighter in training.

Every time her daughter said "I love it" the Mom said "I hate it. But it's your money; do whatever you want". Every time the daughter said "I really like this color" the Mom said "I hate it". For every utterance of "This is SO comfortable!" by the daughter the Mother said "I'm not sleeping on it, so you can forget about me coming over to watch those kids".

I honestly wanted to hit her over the head with a bottle of ripple. Which is what I was heading to buy as soon as I could get the ditz to shut up. If it's good enough for Fred Sanford, it's good enough for me. Seriously, the lady DIDN'T live with her daughter, wasn't helping BUY the freaking furniture, and kept rushing us because she had to get to a Texas Hold-Em tournament by 6.

If there is any justice she has lost her entire life savings, pawned her beat up jalopy, and is begging her daughter to let her crash on her couch for the next 3 years.

And no, I'm not bitter.

But there needs to be a Hall of Fame for Dinks 'cause this woman is a first ballot shoo in.

11 comments:

Redbeard76 said...

What's ripple?

Good luck with virtual waiting room hell tomorrow. Too bad i'll miss out again this year, they really time that badly- i never have the money every year it comes around.

Ted D said...

Redbeard, tell me you've seen "Sanford and Son." Cheap wine that Fred and Grady used to drink!

Redbeard76 said...

Nope, never seen it. Hey I learned something new tonight! I guess you're never too old...

Ted D said...

Bro, you have got to check out Nick at Night for the Sanford and Son reruns.

Classic doesn't begin to cover it.

Tex said...

Next time something like that happens...perhaps you could suggest the mother to go look for a couch she thinks the daughter will enjoy...while mom is gone...you can seal the deal

Ted D said...

Tex, that's better than trying to smother her with a throw pillow; I think I'll try it.

Tex said...

yah, cos you could get locked up for that one

you need to learn the art of distracting.

~**Dawn**~ said...

If that were me shopping with my mother, I would have closed the deal on that furniture just to spite her.

Beth said...

Ah, dealing with the public is such a joy!

Tree Newt said...

Bleeeeaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!


Glad I don't have to deal with it anymore bro! That gave me flashbacks to trying to sell Major!!!

Ted D said...

Dawn, it's the closest I've came to actually telling someone "Would you please shut up so I can talk?"

Beth, most days it's not so bad; but this woman was pushing my buttons.

Mattie, you would have LOST it. Seriously.