Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Time Marches On

My Grandmother Rakes passed away this morning. Truth is, she left this earth over 7 years ago; her mind just didn't tell her body it was time to go. Alzheimer's took it and just made it seem like it never happened. At least for her.

I watched my Mom go every week to Virginia and sit with her and when I called Mom to see how it went she was always positive and upbeat, even though I knew it was killing her. Those of you that know me realize I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, but even I could figure THAT out.

Granny never knew Rakes or Trot; the last 5 years or so she didn't even know me. And 2 days from now I'll be a pallbearer at her funeral, just like I've been at my Grandpa and Grandma Dalton and my Uncle Henry. And I'll be forced to realize I'm one step closer to my own mortality. I look at my wife and kids and one part of me thinks it'll last forever. The other part knows better.

Days like this remind me that one day MY kids are going to have to deal with THEIR Grandparents, and eventually us, leaving this earth. I'm usually about as deep as a mud puddle and I'm well aware I'm rambling, but this is sort of helping me deal with all this crap right now. So I hope you'll bear with me.

Tell your family you love them. Multiple times per day. Really listen to them when they talk and try and remember this; they won't always be here. Hug your kids, spouse, or loved ones and don't ever leave something unsaid. Take the time to make the time; one day you won't have a choice.

Tomorrow I'm sure I'll be back to ranting about poop or Slappy and his pathetic press conference or why Rocco Baldelli will be the key component to the Red Sox winning the AL East this coming year.

Today? I'm just a doofus trying to make some cosmic sense of it all.

If you've wished me well on Facebook or sent me an email or just thought about me and my family today, I can't thank you enough.

And to Cyn and Tex who reached out and texted me today? You will NEVER know how much you guys mean to me.

R.I.P Granny Rakes.

Teddy loves you.


HorshamScouse said...

Well said, my friend. My heart goes out to you.

I had the same experience with my Mum, who lost the last four years to dementia. Keep strong.

Ted D said...

Thanks, John. I appreciate you thinking about us and you obviously know what we're dealing with. Thanks, friend. Looking forward to seeing you again in May.

Krystle said...

My Aunt's father-in-law (or my Uncle's dad, that works too) had Alzheimer's and he died in September. Just as the playoffs were about to begin, go figure right. He was really gone probably about the same time as your grandmother was. I think at one point, he just assumed that I was his grandkid because I was always at their family events since my grandparents died when I was.

This is why baseball is such a fun game, it keeps your mind off the bad stuff like this for about 3 or 7 hours of the day, depends who we're playing! Sorry, bad pun while trying to make you laugh. Hope my bad college humor isn't too bad!

Heart goes out to you! Take comfort that she's in a better place and maybe can remember you in Heaven. =].

Tree Newt said...

Strange week, bro. Thanks for calling tonight. It's been real tough on Amanda and her family. Totally different feeling than with Granny. You know, it was a sad release in Granny's case...she'd been gone for so long, like you said. With Amanda's aunt...different story, and they're all taking it real hard.

I've been thinking a lot about it this week, and it's tough, no matter how you slice it. Yeah, they're home now. Yeah, they're whole and healthy, new and complete.

But we're not. We're left here, and somethings missing.

That's the hard part. But I know in Whom my hope lies. And that's where it'll remain. Death is beaten, that much is certain. But it sucks to live in between the defeat of death on Calvary, and the abolition of death itself.

Until then...

Love ya bro. See you Thursday.

Ted D said...

Krystle, thanks for the kind words. And it does help; just another part of life you have to deal with as you get older. But thank you.

Mattie, I know you guys have had a tough week. Tell Amanda we're thinking about her and I'll see you tomorrow.

Rich in the garage said...

Im sorry to hear this ted.

I was faced with the sharp reality of death at a young age and then quite often for a few years after that.

The best thing you can do now is hold nothing back. I regret at the time not letting out a lot of the things I felt and feeling like i had to be the one to bear weight becasue my mother was such a wreck when her mother passed away.

Yes, I made it the whole time and didn't make a joke.

Keep your chin up Ted. Good luck with everything/

Ted D said...

Thanks, Rich. I really appreciate it man. And I'm equally impressed you made it through the whole thing without cracking wise at least once. ;)

Thanks again.

Sarah said...

I'm sorry about your loss, Ted. I hope you can take comfort in that she is no longer suffering.

Ted D said...

Thanks, Sarah. And I am thankful she is no longer dealing with all this nonsense. I just wish it was easier on the people she left behind.

Tex said...


Ted D said...

Thanks sis.

Nichole M said...

So sorry for your and your family's loss, Ted. Alzheimer's is so hard on everyone that when death finally does come, it often leaves the family members feeling guilty. Guilty because they are relieved that their loved one has passed. I hope your family can see that she is through suffering and can take some solace in that.

Prayers for you all.

Ted D said...

Thanks, Nichole. It's been a long road but she's in a better place now. Thanks again for the good wishes.