They look normal enough.

You'd think we could go to the local McDonald's for lunch to celebrate Rakes birthday without damaging the hearing of an elderly woman, scare a 9 month old out of her mind, and avoid an incident that PROBABLY should have been reported as a health violation.

You'd think that. And you'd be wrong.

So I'd like to apologize to the perfectly nice grandmother who was there with her adorable little grand daughter for Rakes and Trot screaming like they were in the climatic scene of "I Know What You Did Last Summer" as they repeatedly ran by your table while I threatened bodily harm if they didn't shut it ASAP.

And to the mother of that precious little baby who didn't understand why Trot was screaming "GIVE ME BACK MY BATMAN!" at her child; I've told him a million times if you take a toy out in public you'd better hang onto it and not set it down. You have my deepest, heart-felt apologies.

And to anyone who uses the playground in the next few days, I did a thorough check of the premises before we left and I'm pretty sure nothing was harmed. But when Rakes came over and told me in the most nonchalant way possible that "Trot pooped his pants, Dad" and when I looked up to see my precious little boy duck walking his way across the playground I immediately thought of Dustin Hoffman in a bee keepers suit from "Outbreak" and totally panicked. So if I missed anything, you have my deepest apologies.

I think I'm gonna look into that whole "put a bubble around your house thing and never leave idea" I had a few years back.

I wonder if they need a good furniture salesman in Greenland?