Sunday, November 15, 2009

Top 5 Sports Stories of the Day

1. My previously inept Redskins somehow manage to beat the Broncos. This ranks right up there with the Jets over the Colts in Super Bowl III, Taylor Swift over Kenny Chesney at the CMA's the other night, and me over Einstein in a battle of the wits. How does this sort of thing happen? Personally, I'm giving all credit to the voodoo dolls I had Trot make last night before he went to sleep.

2. Word coming out that Billy Wagner may consider returning to the Red Sox in a non-closer role. Nothing would make me happier than having his 98 mph, left handed throwing fastball sitting out in the bullpen come the 8th inning. Ranking only slightly behind that are his post-game interviews, complete with half a can of Skoal in his lower lip and him looking like he'd rather stuff the interviewer on his office wall than answer "So, Billy. How do you feel?"

3. The Hot Stove. Somewhere in a top secret location Theo is trying to figure out how to fleece the Padres for Adrian Gonzalez, what exactly Jason Bay is worth, and is it possible to get a Short Stop made of titanium, solid steel, and impervious to injury and the dreaded throw into the 5th row behind first.

4. Is it remotely possible that a meteor can hit the Yankees spring training site in February and while not causing any deaths, still create an atmosphere of chaos and mayhem that will last the entire 2010 season?

5. If everything plays out I could be 6-4 and sitting in fourth place in my fantasy football league come tomorrow morning. You could go to Mars and find some wet behind the ears alien baby and it would still be better in Fantasy Football than me, so when I tell you this is big you're just gonna have to trust me. In fact, this is entering the Rocky beating Apollo, The Bad News Bears beating the Yankees, and the Red Sox coming back from three games down in '04 territory. Years from now, songs may be sung about this very era.

More than likely I'll end up on the outside looking in and wondering what if but it's still pretty flipping nice.

When is Truck Day again?


Rich in the garage said...

Somehow I've managed to win three games.

I dont know how. This week I decided to not touch my team at all...and they turned out ok.

You forgot the Mole Man Chronicles in your possible off season chitty chats.

Is it can be happens?

Ted D said...

That may be your best strategy; just let it be and hope for the best. And how can I forget the Mole Man Chronicles? (I'm starting to really worry about you.)

Rich in the garage said...

Don't worry about me. If the nucleur holocaust comes itll be me the lawyers and the cocharoaches left.

Ted D said...

And Keith Richards.

Rich in the garage said...

And Keith and I will party.

Ted D said...

You may be the one thing that could kill Keith Richards.

But I doubt it.

fla beck said...

Re:your post.
1.)Hail to the Redskins,hail victory! :)
2.)Again,yay Virginia!
3.)wholeheartedly agree
4.)Thanks for the qualification of no deaths,Tampa is too close and Alexis is there
5.)Go Ted!

Ted D said...

Thanks, Becky! And can you believe they beat the Broncos?

Rich in the garage said...

Either that or he'll turn out to be my biological father after I beat him in a game of the drink a la family guy.

Ted D said...

Haven't seen that one. Not sure I want to...