Tomorrow, for me, is one of the greatest sports days of the year and at the same time one of the worse. Tomorrow, the NFL crowns it's yearly champion amidst an all day extravaganza (The NFL Network is starting at NINE a.m. For a game that starts around SIX THIRTY at night. What in God's name can they talk about that hasn't been beaten into the ground already? I'm fully expecting one hour to be devoted to Peyton Manning's SNL gigs at this point. And as big of a Deion Sanders fan as I am, I STILL can't imagine watching him pontificate for nine hours wearing a suit that doubles as a slip cover.)
See, I'm sort of a 2 sport guy. Baseball first and NFL football second. I'll watch a NCAA football game if it's on and I can't find something better and I keep up with the paper and the Interwebs but give me the choice of Gordon Ramsay or Alabama vs Florida and I'm taking the foul mouthed Brittish dude in a heartbeat.
And you can forget about college basketball, which makes me somewhat of an oddball here on Tobacco Road; these people take Duke/UNC basketball to a Blood vs Crips level and I just don't get it. Why should I care about a bunch of kids who are going to bolt after one year just to go to the NBA and sit on the bench? And don't even get me started on Dick Vitale, a man I STRONGLY feel should be classified as a menace to society. Enough with the "Baby!" shtick; it stopped being funny about the same time Sansabelt slacks went out of style.
As for the NBA, if I want to watch a bunch of guys chuck it and dunk it and trash talk their way through 60 minutes I can just walk out my front door, give Rakes and Trot a ball, and let the festivities commence.
NASCAR? Nah. Although I do get a kick out of the winner doing his "I'd like to thank Chevrolet, Mt Dew, Penzoil, Preparation H, and Dairy Queen for giving me such a great car", watching 40 guys turn left for 500 miles sort of loses it's appeal after about 2 laps. My brother tells me Hockey is where it's at, but I have no idea what, if any rules there are. And while I appreciate the skill level it takes to skate backwards while keeping a puck away from some Russian dude who'd like nothing better than to shatter your larynx I still can't make myself watch.
So tomorrow I'll watch Manning and Brees and Bush and Wayne and suffer through 3+ hours of Jim Nance telling me the obvious while wondering, not for the first time, how Phil Simms parlayed one great Super Bowl into a gig where he's considered one of the top voices of the game. Like Don King says: Only in America.
However, I'll watch with a heavy heart.
'Cause it's a LONG time from Super Bowl Sunday until Opening Day.
Saints 35. Colts 32.
You heard it here first.
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