What Would Eck Say

*Image courtesy of bostondirtdogs.com*

(Before anyone flips out, I didn't go to the above site; just googled "Images of Brad Penny" and this popped up. But in deference to my good friend Kelly O, I try to give credit for a picture where credit is due.)

As I watched Brad Penny do his best Cy Young impersonation tonight and listened to Ang pack for a week at the beach while wondering what household object Trot would find to whizz in this time, my mind, feeble as it is, wandered.

Being that I live 5 hours away from Baltimore and am in the Orioles home market, I was forced to watch the game on MASN with the always ear bleeding inducing Gary Thorne on play by play and Buck "I say his name David ORtiz" on color, (this is reason #4,671 I'm kicking Bud Selig square in the marbles whenever I meet him) I had no Don Orsillo and whoeveriscallingthegamewithhimuntilRemycomesback.

Turns out it was Gordon Edes, who I like as a writer but don't know if I'd want to sit through 9 innings of him stuttering and stammering his way through his points. Besides, I've already got Rakes for that.

So I imagined what Eck would say. And I'd hasten to bet there are countless middle aged men wh did the same thing, so stop looking at me like that.

Eck: "How do you not love a guy who looks like he rolled out of bed, branded 38 cows, drank a 12 pack of Busch Light, ate the 24 ounce T-Bone for lunch, and throws 98 mph cheese with no salad and kept Brian Roberts from going bridge."

Yes, I realize I need help. And yes, I'm not going to do the first thing about it.

But for the love of a Fenway Frank it was great to see the boys get a win tonight, even if the MFY won AGAIN. If you read about a "mysterious package" arriving at The Toilet in the next few days?

It wasn't me.