Saturday, March 15, 2008

Dykstra, Oil Can, and Rakes?

I got my new Sports Illustrated on Thursday, and while perusing it in, well, let's just say the "reading room" today, I got quite the shock. Lenny Dykstra, who spent the better part of the early 90's playing CF for the Phillies, drooling tobacco juice down the front of his uniform, and being the poster boy for "What steroids can do for YOU" is apparently some sort of financial genius.

Turns out the guy who used to crash into walls as often as he crashed his car, was a compulsive gambler, and the leader of the "Idiot" Phillie teams of the early 90's now owns THE PLAYERS CLUB. While the name leads one to think it's some sort of strip joint, it's actually a financial service for professional athletes designed to help them manage the money they make playing sports and keep from blowing it all.

It got me thinking about former Red Sox players who sort of fell out of the public eye after playing, and where they were now.

First one to come to mind? Dennis "Oil Can" Boyd.

A career 78-77 pitcher, Oil Can was Manny before Manny even came along. He gave us quotes like "I am The Can, and I am going to come right at you with my best s**t, and if you can hit it, I want to see how far Bo Jackson can hit The Oil Can." Bo then deposited Can's first pitch up and over the 71 foot high scoreboard in Fenway.

Or "You've got to do what's good for The Can." This sounds innocent enough, until you find out he was referring to crossing the picket line in 1994/1995 to play with the "scabs" before the infamous "Let's just cancel the World Series strike". I'm guessing that didn't exactly endear him to his fellow union members.

Even better was this: "That’s what they get for building a park on the ocean." The park he was referring to? Cleveland Municipal Stadium. In Ohio.

Last seen, he was bouncing around the Independent Leagues in 2005 at the young age of 45.

I don't know why I've always been drawn to the Manny and Oil Can's of the sports world. I guess I just liked the oddballs and eccentrics all my life. Maybe it's because I CAN'T be that guy who just says whatever he wants and doesn't care about the consequences.

Or better yet?

Maybe Oil Can and Manny were just prepping me for having a son like Rakes.

He DID score 5 goals in his soccer game today, then babbled for an hour tonight about how Soccer and Darth Vader were somehow intertwined.

I still have no clue what he was talking about.

But it WAS funny.


JMP said...

In the "can" thinking about Oil Can Boyd??

Too much info, dude!!!

Big YEAH and HIGH 5 to Rakes for the goals.

And if I ever visit your house..remind me NOT to read your SI's!!! :>}

Have a great Sunday !

Tree Newt said...

Bro, that was classic! One of your best of late, IMO. Oil Can was like Ricky gotta love someone who refers to himself in the 3rd person.

But as to whether or not you can be the guy who says what he wants when he wants, see: "I make five times as you...I shouldn't have to clean the house!"

The defense rests.

Ted D said...

JMP, don't tell me you don't have a reading room. Isn't that everywhere? And FYI, don't read the books in my office either!

Mattie, 'preciate the compliment. Ricky is a post for another day. And you make a good point; although that was a lot of years and no kids ago.

I've changed since then. ;)

Tree Newt said...

To that Matt says:

"You can lead a horse to water...but you can't make him think...

before he speaks."

Ted D said...

Bite me, Oat Meal.

Tree Newt said...

C'mon! I thought that was a clever reply. It was in the third person and everything!

Ted D said...

OK, I'll give you credit. It was sort of clever.

You're still a dink.

Tree Newt said...

As long as yoy agree I'm a clever dink.

Ted D said...

The "yoy" cancels out the clever part. ;)

Redbeard76 said...

Two more months buddy boy - I just notice 60 days are left on your countdown today.

Stacy said...

You two can't even give or receive a compliment without resorting to name calling. :)

Never heard of Oil Can. Thanks for the educatin'.

Ted D said...

Stephen, it's actually 59 days. When I put it up I was leaving on a Friday, but they changed my flight so now I leave on a Thursday. But it's coming!

Stacy, he started it.

Tex said...

\\Never heard of Oil Can.//

::G A S P:: Ted. are you SURE she's related to YOU????

Ted D said...

I'm pretty sure, Tex. Although I could have been adopted or just left on the doorstep.

Stacy and I didn't really start talking until about 5 years ago.

I don't really want to get into it. ;)

Tex said...

ok Ted. you're getting to fancypants around here for your own good. a baseball clock?? and now you've joined the Nation??? linking it?? ::rolls eyes::

Ted D said...

Not fancypants, just tinkering. ;)

RSN is a network Dawn started that Stephen and I joined. We need a rowdy Texan to liven things up. You know anybody? ;)

And don't be rolling your eyes at me, young lady. They'll stick like that and then where will you be?

Tex said...

::dials florida::

"hey josh, so while the boys are in japan, I got a site for you to check out"

::sticks out tongue::

Ted D said...

I meant YOU, silly.

::rolls eyes::


Tex said...

Oh. i knew that. but I figured Id call my good friend Josh to see if he would be interested too.

Ted D said...

I'm starting to worry about you, sis. ;)