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Friday, June 1, 2007

The Devil came in the form of an Angel, right?

Angie called me at work today to tell me the latest antics of Beavis and Butthead: if I had been at home when this happened, I think I would be on my way to the nearest crack dealer to erase the memory from my mind in the quickest way possible.

Seems like Rakes, well, for all you parents out there, had "gone #2" in the potty. It also seems as if Rakes forgot the golden rule in Ted's house, which is ALWAYS close the bathroom door so the 14 month old holy terror does not wreak his particular brand of mayhem.

Next thing Ang hears is Rakes saying "Mommy-my baby is in the bathroom." By the time she got there, Trot had grabbed the, well, you know, out of the toilet: and had wiped it on the floor, the wall, his clothes, and basically everything but the light on the ceiling.

If it had been me at home? Forget it: I would have just curled up in the fetal position in a corner somewhere. God Bless her, Angie cleaned everything that needed cleaning and put the boys in the van to head out to her get together she was trying to go to. She goes back inside to get a water bottle, and upon opening the door to the garage, what does she see?

Rakes: taking a whizz out the door of the van on the garage floor. I kid you not: the boy was just letting it all hang out, leaning out of the door with, according to her, the same look he has in this picture. After getting HIM cleaned up, she gets back in the van and detects that particular odor one gets from an infant from time to time, and has to change HIS clothes again before she can leave.

Have I said how much it scares me these two are getting into this much mischief at 3 and 14 months, respectively? If not, I am SCARED TO DEATH what these hooligans will be like at 14 and 11: I've got to ask my Mom if Matt and I were like this. If we were, this blog may have a shelf life of about another 10 years, give or take.

As for the Red Sox/Yankee game tonight? Never happened. You hear me? It never happened.

Father Curt takes the mound tomorrow. And all will be right with the world.

25 comments:

Tree Newt said...

For once, I am speechless. Why? Because I can't stop laughing!!!!!

KAYLEE said...

HAHA I am sorry but,I was doing the same thing mattie was while reading this post.

Ted D said...

Listen Corn Meal: Yuk it up. You have a daughter. You ever have a boy, I'm busting your marbles from here to next Tuesday.

Wake was WAY off tonight: though the almost fight, and the fact the final score was 9-5 gives me hope.

They throw at Youk's head, we should put one in Slappy's earhole tomorrow. This is getting ridiculous: the Yankees are getting away with murder.

Someone, either Schill, or Donnelly, or Beckett, needs to set them straight:

You do NOT throw at someone's head, unless you expect the same.

Tex said...

Ted...it's just poop.

did the Red Sox play tonight?

KAYLEE said...

//did the Red Sox play tonight?//

UMM YEAH JUST NOT WELL!

VTek said...

We also have that golden rule (closing the bathroom door). When D was in there with me a few days ago watching me brush my teeth, she put her hand in the toilet for the first time (just water). I'm now thankful it wasn't the same scenario that Angie went through. My goodness!

Back in April when things were better for the Yanks, I noticed they weren't retaliating after their players were hit. Now that they're in the hole, oh yeah!

Ted D said...

Morning everyone. Texas, how'd the UT game go? Heard it was a little "dry".

Carol, Angie is having the garage sale this morning: I'm laying on the couch, look up, and Trot has brought the toilet paper from the bathroom all the way to the living room! About 3/4 of a whole roll: Carol, if John says he wants more kids, just tell him NO. Trust me. :)

Tex said...

Ted it didnt rain if thats what you mean :)
UT won over Brown..i sorta felt sorry for Brown..their 1st baseman started making errors at the end...it was a good game though. Although I wore my red sox tanktop...i saw another guy with a red sox shirt while I was sitting in the stands...he was down a few rows in front of me getting to his seat...i yelled out "Go Red Sox!" he turned and did the thumbs up...I looked around and everyone was staring at me kinda with that "WTF" look...then laughed.

VTek said...

Toilet paper & little ones - Ugh! D likes to spin it out long too. If I lived in NC, I would come to Angie's yard sale. Hope she sells lots of stuff (so you can move in the garage)!

Ted D said...

Thanks Carol: so far, so good. I've had my excitement for the morning: just got into an argument with some idiot speeding through the neighborhood after I yelled at her to slow down. Ah, the quiet suburban life!

Taking the kids to the pool now: I'll be back on around game time.

And yes Tex: i meant I heard it didn't rain. ;)

Stacy said...

The lady that drove down your street was most unpleasant. But I bet Tex could've taken her. :)

VTek said...

Ted - That's sounds like something that would happen to me. As a rule, I don't speed, and especially not thru suburban neighborhoods. Hope you guys had fun at the pool!

Ted D said...

Tex would have dragged her out of the car and stomped a mudhole in her.

Carol, we had a great time: just exhausted. Getting ready to put the boys down, grab me a shower, and watch Schilling dominate.

VTek said...

A-Rod was just booed by Deirdre when he got up to bat LOL

KAYLEE said...

HAHA Carol,yopur daughter has the right idea there I love it!

Tex said...

Stacy who is telling these tall tales of me being such a violent person??? Im just a lil ole Texas gal who loves the Red Sox. I don't have a mean bone in my body.

(unless you drive like a maniac on Ted's street)

Ted D said...

Carol, with that comment about your daughter you have convince me you are doing a MARVELOUS job of raising Baby D!

Thanks Tex: knew you'd have my back.;)

VTek said...

Thanks Ted - Was the 7th inning great or what?!

Ted D said...

I'm still hoarse Carol: what an inning.

Surprised you didn't hear me all the way up there!

VTek said...

Lol - It was electrifying!

Ted D said...

Mike Lowell has had him one heck of a day:

11-6 top of the ninth.

::holds breath::

VTek said...

Ending in sweet victory!

Tex said...

Mikey is da man. Yay Sox...wish I coulda seen this game. Tomorrow my boy is up. I WILL watch then.

Stacy said...

I'm with Tex; Mikey is THE man. :) He had a great game.

Sam Jackson's Lovechild said...

boy, i really want kids. thoiugh without the penchant for playing with poo. i think ill tell them that whilst still in the womb

*leans over wife's pregnant belly while she sleps*

"dont play with anyone's caca. dont do it. dont ever. oh, and the yankees suck. but dont say that until you are 7, and dont tell mom i told you. i have more grown up ones for you when get older. but im rambling: dont play with crap. i love you"