I'll admit when I suggested to Ang that we take the kids to the lake this afternoon I wasn't thinking with my head but with my heart. I saw the picture perfect Carolina blue sky and the 68 degree weather and my first impulse was to spend the day outdoors and together.It never crossed my mind that 4,798 other people would be thinking the same thing when we got to the playground by the lake, or that Rakes bringing his "laser gun" would cause every other kid on the playground to want to take it away from him. Have I mentioned Rakes inherited the classic Little Man syndrome from me in which he has no problem talking trash to anyone in his space and would have willingly submitted to being thrown into the lake before he let some kid he didn't know play with his gun?
After 15 tension filled minutes of watching Rakes shoot the other kids, Trot yelling "You can't have my brothers gun!" and Ciera laughing her head off I managed to convince them if we went on the nature walk around the lake we might see a bear.
Mind you, there hasn't been a bear sighting around the lake since the first of never, but it was enough of a promise for the hellions to quit terrorizing the other children and hit the bricks.
What followed was a Griswold-esque experience of wandering the trails backward while travelling roughly 2.5 miles to cover maybe 1 full mile. We had walking sticks attacking trees, Trot JUST missing a head on collision with what the owner told me was a dog but I'm fairly certain was a midget pony, and Rakes collapsing to the forest floor and muttering "I can't go on."
Throw in Trot falling down over a tree root every 15 feet, Angie attempting to set the World Record for Fastest Time Around The Lake While Wearing Dress Shoes, and the always popular "Rakes and Trot Pee at the Same Time while Crossing Swords" and you could say we had a full day.
Always looking at the glass being half full, I'm proud to say nobody got lost, the lake is still there, and other than a few discarded walking sticks and some freaked out fellow hikers we had a good day.
Tomorrow?
Chuck E. Cheese.
I'm tempted to tell Ang to call them in the morning and let them know I'm coming.
And Hell's coming with me.
But I figure the Mouse has heard it all before.
First thing tomorrow morning I'm headed to the sporting goods store to buy a cup.
11 comments:
Dude, I have mad respect for you.
And props for the Tombstone reference. Good usage, too!
Tell Chucky I said "word."
maybe you should buy a dozen
Your entries never cease to entertain. Sadly, now I must get back to work (yes, at almost 12:30).
Once again, Ted, you made me laugh out loud at work (many thanks). Best of luck today!!
Mattie, it's always good to get a "Tombstone" reference in when you can.
Tex, good idea; I think you can get them in bulk.
Sarah, glad I could help you pass the time; working at midnight? Yeesh.
Hi Bridget. Glad I could help you get a laugh early in the day; and thanks for the well wishes. I'm gonna need 'em.
Im going to get rakes a box of matches for christmas.
"Here kid go light a fire"
Remind me to take you out of the will.
Great family fun...
Mine went a little differently last week but with more disastrous results. 10 minutes after we get to the playground Sierra manages to find the only mud pit in the whole playground and gets covered in it, ruining our nice afternoon out having to drive back home to clean up.
Where did you get that red sox shirt, I like that style!
Remind me to take you out of the will.//
Dear Rakes,
Enclosed is The Unabomber's address in prison. He's kind of like Santa, please feel free to write to him.
-Crazy Cousin Rich
You're killing me, Jr.
Missed you there, Redbeard. Mine usually do the same thing Sierra did, but somehow we avoided it this time.
I got it at the Yawkey Way store online a few years ago for about $10 bucks on closeout. It's seen it's better days, but can survive a day at the lake.
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